Posts Tagged ‘nothing’

He knows nothing

December 1, 2017

The best trick about writing is to start and keep writing itself. You stop writing when you stop writing. There is no secret about it.

There are many such useless thoughts that he keep pondering on while wasting hours and hours of doing whatever unspecified things. It’s not that he is not doing anything and he is not enjoying whatever something he is doing. He is trying at least.

Emptiness. He had thought he would not use this world. But perhaps that should be the word to describe his state. He runs, he plays flute, he scrolls down miles on twitter and facebook. Not that everything is boring; but the culmination of it all certainly is. Life itself is boring. Sum of it all what is interesting is somehow turning out to be boring.

This is not an ideal state of living, he knows. That most of this is self-imposed, he understands. What is one to do when they can’t feel the happiness that they ought to? These are the questions he keeps wondering about. Life slips, he knows, life slips.

What is it that stops him from being someone? He would care nothing, but it is getting clearer day by day that the someone he finds himself being unable to become is he himself. He doesn’t know what to make of it.

He knows nothing.

Of nothingness…

November 24, 2013

There is a certain nothingness for which I exist. I know this is too vague of a statement, but I am doing vague things and living vague moments and have stopped dreaming of a vague future. I am catching up on things – not people.

Dreams needed to be curtailed – I did that. Why should one dream of life when one can dream of a big home (with lavish furniture in it), etc.? I have somehow convinced myself. I can somehow manage to not miss you – not now, and not a few years later.

You remember? One of our very first meets when we met after my office hours in a coffee shop – those comfy sofas, pleasant ambiance, some cricket match on TV, you – and I had told you “This is peace.” Now I have learned that that peace was not because of something “out of the world”, but it can certainly be recreated with the same sofas etc., can’t it?

I will manage it somehow! You know “a man at 30 should know himself like a palm of his own hand etc.” I am going to be 30 soon. I cannot keep things pending. I must lose you if I cannot achieve you – and convince myself it is for better.